Archives for category: The importance of storytelling

Stumbling onto What’s Your Calling? was like finding myself in a meeting where the chemistry is right and the conversation flows freely. So when we connected on Twitter (@whatsURcalling), and Erin Williams (Engagement Campaign Manager for The Calling & What’s Your Calling?) asked me to participate in a blog tour, I jumped at the chance to try to articulate my calling: stories.

What’s Your Calling? is sponsoring a Calling Dream Kit contest. Find details at the bottom of this post.

“Where your talents and the needs of the world cross lies your calling.” ~ Aristotle

From eavesdropping to storytelling

One advantage of being a quiet, well-behaved child was that I could listen for hours to stories not meant for young ears. I could color or play with dolls while adults within earshot spun tales about betrayals, triumphs, furtive meetings, secrets. I never tired of the stories and stored them away in my heart.

I didn’t think of their hold on me as a calling until I was in my thirties. I credit a kindergartener with helping me see I could turn that fascination into a career. Her rapt attention as I told a story to her class threw me headlong into storytelling, first as a school librarian and then through twists and turns in my professional life.

I discovered I could take the stories I’d heard, read or lived and give them back and that sometimes people listening to or reading the stories found a measure of healing in them. I also learned I could nudge people, and even organizations, to believe in the power of their own stories to heal themselves, others, their communities.

Finding healing in stories

Dinesen quote

Isak Dinesen is often quoted as saying, "All sorrows can be borne if you put them into a story or tell them as a story." (Photo of Cathryn in Queenstown, New Zealand)

In Storytelling: Imagination and Faith William Bausch nailed my calling in two sentences: “When a man [sic] comes to you and tells you your own story, you know that your sins are forgiven. And when you are forgiven, you are healed.”

 

When I began to contemplate sharing stories in the public sphere of blogs, I chose this quote from Carolyn Heilbrun, in Last Gift of Time, to guide me: “Women, I believe, search for fellow beings who have faced similar struggles, conveyed them in ways a reader can transform into her own life, confirmed desires the reader had hardly acknowledged—desires that now seem possible. Women can catch courage from the women whose lives and writings they read, and women call the bearer of that courage friend.”

Though both quotes are gender specific, I re-write them in my mind to include any hearts that vibrate when touched by stories.

A legacy of stories

My calling is to create a legacy of stories. I’ve done that in many ways during my meandering career as teacher, librarian, storyteller, farmer, musician, rancher, consultant, community developer. Now I’m doing it as a writer, primarily through three blogs: Catching Courage, Story Route, and Crossroads.

Stories are the one thing of value I can pass on. Not just my own stories but others that inspire and teach me. I write and tell stories because they have the power to stitch together sorrows, passions, joys, and confusions. I piece them together to lay a quilt of comfort over a wounded world.

In a 1990 interview with Common Boundary magazine, Alice Walker said, “Stories differ from advice in that, once you get them, they become a fabric of your whole soul. That is why they heal you.”

And so I write—and occasionally tell—stories. They are my most valuable possessions, my life’s calling. This is where I find meaning, working to create a healing legacy of stories.

“If we look upon our experiences as assets, we must manage to preserve or transfer those assets to other people before we die or they dissolve in the grave with us.” Phyllis Theroux, The Journal Keeper

Calling Dream Kit contest:
You can follow the blog tour on the What’s Your Calling? Facebook Page. Subscribe for a chance to win a Calling Dream Kit including $200 in Amazon.com gift credit to buy supplies you’ll need as you pursue your calling, a DVD and poster of The Calling, and an hour of coaching to help plan your project and the chance to share your calling with the community.

What’s Your Calling? explores notions of “calling” from both religious and secular perspectives, or what people feel most passionate about doing with their lives – and why.

Two of my personal favorites on this wonderful site are:

  • Poet Ruth Forman on The Power and Magic of Language, who says: “Have the courage to address those things inside of you that you’re afraid to address. So, for instance, as a writer, have the courage to write about those things that you’re afraid to write about, that you wouldn’t even want to admit to yourself because if you can conquer that in yourself, you can probably conquer everything else that’s going on around you.”
  • T.J. Anderson, talented composer who says in Any man or woman in a bathtub can give you a tune, “The reason people doubt is they’re seeking perfection. I sought to be the best I could be at a particular time and am still seeking that.”
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Lately I’ve been feeling like a very small dot on a big, troubled planet. The stories I hear on awakening or while preparing a meal are like vultures pecking at my peace of mind.

We all know the headlines: Devastating earthquakes in New Zealand and Japan. Floods in Australia. Tsunami and nuclear disaster in Japan. Protests in Egypt. Civil war in Libya. Acidification and plastic pollution of our oceans. Peak oil. Climate change. Drought. Hunger. Disease. Fear. Violence. Corruption.

So I was pulled up short when Liz Weir, a dear friend and one of the best storytellers on the planet, sent this to me:

You storytellers know how to describe peace. We need you more than ever.

I am a journalist. I get paid for writing about wars and other disasters.

You storytellers know the truth behind what we other people think is the
truth.

Tell us all about it!

Winfried Dulisch

Winfried is a talented writer and musician. He is also an astute critic. He has experienced the spell of Liz’s stories. He understands that in the space between words and listeners something important happens. And that something is truth.

Not the capital T kind that True Believers of any ilk use as a club. More the subtle kind of truth that sneaks up on us and startles us into awareness.

So many times I’ve been jolted upright by a story. Epiphanies emerge from folk tales, myths, and legends. They rise out of history, family stories, and dinner conversation. And, yes, they pop up in the news.

Just this past week I’ve been reminded of that. Bombarded by death, loss, destruction and war, I have found refreshment in the well of stories.

When workers at the Fukushima nuclear plant began exposing themselves to dangerous levels of radiation, I remembered the story Dr. Wangari Maathai told in the movie Dirt! While all the animals of the forest fled a raging fire, the hummingbird flew back and forth, filling her beak with water, pouring it on the fire. She persisted when the other animals mocked her puny efforts. Matthai said she will be like the hummingbird: “I will do the best I can.”

A video about factory farming plunged me into despair, but another about a dog who would not leave his injured canine pal buoyed me. The two friends were rescued by compassionate volunteers. The injured dog was taken to the vet, the faithful pal to a no-kill shelter. The video went viral, and money poured in to help other animals in need of rescue.

A couple days ago Dayna from Bella Coola sent me the link to Singing Our Treasures Back to Life. She cautioned me to start at the bottom, with the first entry, and work my way up. The blog has only a few entries, every one of them powerful.

Six young men from the Heiltsuk community traveled from Bella Bella, British Columbia, to the American Museum of Natural History in New York. The young men brought the spirit of the Heiltsuk people to objects taken from their land long ago. Their intent was “to sing these treasures back to life”.

The whole account is deeply moving. I will never again look at items in a museum in quite the same way. And so I take to heart this message from the blog:

“Please carry this story with you. It’s your story now, and I want you to share it. Celebrate with us. We uphold you and uplift you – you have witnessed something that is of great importance to us. The strength of our story, like the strength of our people, will not diminish. We hold it in a sacred space within us – a space of narrative, memory and language – a space of touch and sound and light – a space that is shared between all of us, and you, and everyone who reads this. We will remain strong together.”

Strong together. Yes. That’s it. Our world’s not just a sorry old place. It is mysterious and beautiful. Our lives have meaning. For every act of corruption, violence or betrayal, there are thousands more of generosity, love or compassion.

We must tell those stories. We must live those stories. We must pass them on.

Stories are a sacred legacy.

Stories are our truth.

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This past weekend Robin and I immersed ourselves in a documentary film festival. Most of the films were sobering. I left Green so distressed I had to call it quits for the day. [And I'd still recommend everyone watch the film, which can be viewed online.] Two gave me belly laughs (The Topp Twins: Untouchable Girls and Laughology).

As we were watching films about corporate greed, environmental degradation, and white-collar crime, a 9.0 earthquake was shaking the earth and changing the lives of tens of thousands of people in Japan. The fourth Fukushima nuclear reactor is spewing radiation as I type.

So this visual metaphor from a talented designer is timely and deserves a wide audience.

Based loosely on Rafe Martin‘s adaptation of a Japanese folktale, Roopaantar tells the story of a young man who enters a forest and falls in love with a mysterious young woman.

She goes with him to the city, but the destruction of the forest spells death to the tree spirit she is. The young man’s tears bring the tree back to life. In death he rejoins his love.

Pandey ends her short film with a quote from William Blake:

A tree which moves some to tears of joy is in the eyes of others only a Green thing that stands in the way. Some see Nature all ridicule and deformity… and some scarce see Nature at all. But to the eyes of the man of Imagination, Nature is Imagination itself.

Share this one with your friends, and send thanks to Radha Pandey.

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When the U.S. FedBizOpps (Federal Business Opportunities) Web site advertises a workshop entitled, “Analysis and Decomposition of Narratives in Security Contexts”, it’s time to face up to the shadow side of storytelling. Since the workshop took place February 28, 2011, I figure the workshop URL may disappear any time. So let me assure you that even if the link is broken when you click on it, this workshop is for real.

The full title was “Stories, Neuroscience and Experimental Technologies (STORyNET): Analysis and Decomposition of Narratives in Security Contexts.” The hosting agency was the Defense Sciences Office (DSO) of the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA). Here’s the description:

This workshop is intended as a precursor to exploring the neurobiological mechanisms which undergird narrative processing so as to establish fertile ground for connecting our understanding of the neuropsychology of stories with models, simulations and sensors salient to security concerns. To this end, the workshop will focus on surveying theories of narrative, understanding what role they play in security domains, and establishing the state of the art in story analysis and decomposition frameworks.

If you remember Orwell’s 1984, you may recognize an unnerving similarity to the Ministry of Truth and its Fiction Department. One of the first things the novel’s government had to do was normalize a new language. Newspeak turned ordinary stories on their head.

Wandering through the DARPA Web site, where war is normalized as nothing more alarming than business strategizing, I got to thinking about George W. Bush on “weapons of mass destruction”, Sarah Palin putting cross hairs on the districts of pro-health care reform Democrats or the Harper government’s decision to scrap the long-form census because it was “coercive and intrusive”.

What all three examples have in common is a defective story with serious ramifications. Soldiers and civilians continue to die in Iraq. Palin supports powerful forces working to keep Americans from having universal health care. The Harper government’s decision to scrap the longer census means there will be inadequate information on which to base policy and funding decisions. When questioned about their actions, Bush, Palin and Harper all created new stories to explain how right they were.

George Orwell explained how it works in his appendix to 1984, “Principles of Newspeak”:

When Oldspeak had been once and for all superseded, the last link with the past would have been severed. History had already been rewritten, but fragments of the literature of the past survived here and there, imperfectly censored, and so long as one retained one’s knowledge of Oldspeak it was possible to read them. In the future such fragments, even if they chanced to survive, would be unintelligible and untranslatable.

I believe in the power of story but acknowledge its knife cuts both ways. We owe it to our children and to the seventh generation to avoid Newspeak, to tell stories that shed light, that inform, that inspire and that, ultimately, lead to a better world.

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“I can’t tell a story,” he said. “My memory’s gone. I’m just here to listen”

The man sat on his motorized wheelchair, in a workshop on telling stories. I remember his jaunty cap and the fringe of grey hair around his ears and the back of his neck. We were at the Tulsey Town Storytelling Festival in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I was giving the group some tips on crafting a compelling tale from the flotsam and jetsam of their lives.

We did some exercises to stir their creative juices. I wanted them to leave with one good story they could wow their friends with, some gem mined from the ore of their lives. We worked at chipping away extraneous detail until only the shining core remained.

They all tried and most were eager to share their polished stones. The man in the wheelchair listened. His eyes were lively. But he couldn’t handle any of the exercises. They were tapping into the labyrinth of his short-term memory. That part of his brain was a jumble. Words dropped in and rolled off into dead ends or got lost around corners.

He dug a gem from the treasure box of his life (Photo courtesy of Sam at Photos8.com, whose work is brilliant)

Still, he laughed and nodded and sighed. I could see he was enjoying himself but was disappointed he couldn’t participate. At the end of the workshop, I learned how wrong my definition of participation had been.

He looked at me with a mischievous grin. “I love listening to stories, but I didn’t think I could ever be a storyteller. Now I know I can.” Others had stopped to talk so he ignored my startled expression and rolled away.

A story swap ended the day. That’s where anyone with a short story to tell can sign up for the chance to share a tale with the kind of receptive audience that flocks to storytelling festivals.

Our man in the wheelchair motored to the front. When all eyes were on him, he said, “Until today I believed I could never be a storyteller. My short-term memory is gone. I thought I had to learn stories in order to tell them. Now I know I can dig in the treasure box of my memories.”

That man dug a gem out of the treasure box of his memories. His short story had us holding our sides with laughter. The storytellers in the audience were wide-eyed with admiration. Here was a natural spinner of tales, a weaver of words, a teller who held us spellbound.

He also had an audience. I don’t know if he found other audiences after that day. I hope so. He was a gifted storyteller.

I thought of him yesterday when I ran across the report of a study carried about by University of Missouri Researchers. Patients with mild to moderate dementia increased their social interaction and were happier, an effect that lasted for weeks after the storytelling sessions. They were using the TimeSlips Creative Storytelling program, designed to tap into the imagination of Alzheimer’s patients. TimeSlips discovered that people with mid to late stages of memory loss may no longer be able to string together a story with beginning, middle and end. But they still have a treasure box of memories, full of shining stones.

We all have a treasure box. One of the greatest gifts we can give each other is to share our shining stones.

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Peter GuberWith Tell to Win, Peter Guber throws his hat into the growing ring of people who understand that sometimes the distance between success and failure is a story. From the first page, Guber demonstrates both his mastery and his awareness of what makes a story work.

Tell to Win focuses on “purposeful” stories. These are stories with a mission, not just entertaining anecdotes. Guber writes, “They cleverly contain information, ideas, emotional prompts, and value propositions that the teller wants to sneak inside the listener’s heart and mind.”

Having stumbled into the field of organizational narrative many years ago, I jumped at the chance to review the book. Developing my own practice, I’ve learned from a string of intelligent, articulate practitioners. So I’m happy to report this new entry in the cannon lives up to expectations.

For one thing, it’s fun. That’s high praise. A book that doesn’t capture my interest quickly joins the pile of books I sample and pass on. This one kept me reading to the last page. I laughed, shuddered, and nodded my head as Guber spun tales of Michael Jackson’s mouse-devouring snake, Michael Milken’s “Keep dad in the game” campaign, and the New Guinean tribesmen’s plan to protect their tourists from the 9/11 terrorists.

Anyone with Peter Guber’s breadth of life experience has fascinating stories to tell, but not everyone knows how to relay them. Guber does. If the book were only a collection of his memories, it would win a place on my shelf. But Tell to Win is more than that because the author has stopped to analyze why the stories he tells, and the best he hears, are so powerfully effective.

He did not just rely on his own considerable powers of observation. He questioned people whose training and experience he could trust, people like Robert Rosen, Dan Siegel, Steven Denning, and many more. He hosted conversations at the UCLA School of Theater, Film and Television, where he is a full professor. And then he reflected, synthesized, and wrote.

Tell to WinThe result of this thorough examination will lead even the most tentative storyteller to become more adept at engaging an audience. Tell to Win starts with the “why” and leads readers through the “how”, illustrating every point and every technique with compelling stories—the kind of purposeful stories Guber believes are game changers.

These stories are game changers because they have a purpose. They are not just entertaining stories, though that is a pre-requisite. They are stories that climb into the hearts and minds of listeners, planting a seed that can grow into action.

When asked if people who aren’t natural storytellers can learn the skill, Guber replied: “Every single person who has watched television, gone to a movie, read a book, listened to a speech, read a newspaper, talked to their family is a story listener. You just turn it on its head and recognize that the same tools for listening done the other way are for telling.”

Tell to Win demonstrates this premise from the first story to the last. Along the way Guber reveals what goes into a good story, how to tell it compellingly, how to connect with an audience, and how to motivate action. Whatever sector you work in, the book will help you learn how to do what the subtitle promises: “Connect, persuade, and triumph with the hidden power of story.”

Peter Guber, Chairman and CEO of Mandalay Entertainment Group, has been a force in the entertainment industry for over thirty years. He has told memorable stories in the films he personally produced or executive produced, including Rain Man, Batman, The Color Purple, Gorillas In The Mist, and Flashdance which have resonated with audiences all over the world, earning over three billion dollars worldwide and garnering more than 50 Academy Award nominations. Guber oversees one of the largest combinations of professional baseball teams and venues nationwide and is the owner and co-executive chairman of the Golden State Warriors.

Peter Guber and Dalai Lama

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No way I could resist checking out a company that calls itself Storytellers for Good. I first learned about them through a short video that had me crying from the start. The story of the founding of Mama Hope caught me from the first shots of Kenyan women and children, dancing and singing, but I was hopelessly engrossed when a young sponsored student began talking about the woman who gave him hope.

A link from there led to the stories4good YouTube channel. Curious about the video makers, I followed a link to Storytellers for Good. Their slogan rolls easily off the tongue: “Promoting goodness…inspiring greatness”.

In the best spirit of “show, don’t tell”, they promote their work—which is helping organizations tell their stories—by highlighting the stories they have created for clients. Links to their videos are the first thing that appears when you click on their home page.

Those wanting to dig behind the videos, to understand the company and how they approach clients’ stories can click on the News/Blog link.

This is a site that will inspire anyone wanting to tell a better story of a project or initiative, but it’s also a full-meal deal for anyone with an open heart and a love of a good story.

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Missing a chance to shine

“Sol’s” story is true, though I’ve changed his name out of deference for the young hero. I met him while working as Storytelling Director for Stagebridge, the US’s oldest senior theatre company

Marijo Joseph, a talented performer who often worked with Stagebridge, was teaching Sol and some of his classmates to be storytellers. The day of their school performance, Sol nearly missed his chance to shine.

When I stopped by the office to sign in, Sol was there on “house suspension”.

“Why are you here?” I asked.

“The teacher said I was talking, but it wasn’t me.” Whatever the case, at that moment Sol was about to miss one of his few chances for positive recognition.

Marijo set off to persuade his classroom teacher to give him a reprieve long enough to perform. I chatted with him briefly, then went to the auditorium.

Sol becomes the story

Minutes before he was to take the stage, Sol hurried into the room. When his turn came, he gave a first-person narrative of a slave who had rowed hundreds of others to freedom. Sol was a natural storyteller. When he performed, he was the story. Though he was the only white child in his class, Sol crawled so completely into the character his skin color didn’t matter.

My eyes were on Sol so I didn’t notice a few classmates lifting their arms to sniff their armpits in a gesture of disdain. The mockery was cruel, but Sol often did reek of unwashed clothing on an unwashed body. His home was a van with no electricity. If he did homework it was by the glow of battery-operated tap lights. Baths and clean clothes were luxuries.

The children’s teasing was not surprising. I’d seen turkeys do the same thing. They’d spot a bit of blood on another turkey and keep pecking at it, sometimes until the victim died. In this case it was Sol’s spirit they were pecking.

Sol was one of those children who talk easily with adults but have trouble finding a niche with their peers. He was one of the few white children in the school, but deep poverty and a lack of age-appropriate social skills were what isolated him from his classmates.

He adored Marijo, who inspired him to stand tall in spite of the stones life was throwing in his path. As we left the gymnasium after the performance, Sol came up to her. “Thank you,” he said. “Stagebridge has provoked my interest in storytelling.”

Wondering how to help

Lady Laura

Lady Laura performing at the 2004 Tellabration

Success in storytelling did not improve Sol’s classroom behaviour. When she couldn’t handle him any more, the teacher transferred him across the hall, to a classroom with a male teacher.

At Stagebridge we pondered how we could help the talented but troubled young man. We decided on a modest plan to focus his energy on something besides stirring up trouble.

Aside from Marijo, he also knew one of our skilled elders, Lady Laura. She had been his classroom’s special storyteller. She was the one who had first sparked his interest in storytelling. We decided to enlist her in our scheme.

Lady Laura was a retired black school teacher. She had dealt with every kind of challenge a student could throw in a teacher’s path. She graciously agreed to go into the school and let Sol interview her, then help him write a story about her good enough to record on radio.

With Lady Laura and Sol’s teacher both supportive, I drove to the school and spoke to Sol. I reminded him that we thought he was a very talented storyteller and asked if he would be willing to interview Lady Laura and write a story for radio. He would have to agree not to act out in class between then and the radio taping, and he would have to keep up with his studies in spite of the extra work. Sol was thrilled and promised to adhere to his end of the bargain.

A small success

I’d like to report the next few weeks were smooth sailing. They weren’t. Lady Laura found working with Sol challenging. His listening and writing skills were not well developed. And, to be honest, being in close proximity to a child with no washing facilities was not always pleasant.

But they both persevered, and on the day of the radio taping, Sol was one of nine children whose stories were recorded for future broadcast on KPFA.

As usual, I had loaded my van with children and adults needing a ride to the studio. My last stop on the return trip was Sol’s. A day earlier, when I offered to pick him up at the school and take him home after the taping, he told me I could drop him off at the bus stop. He’d catch the bus home.

So I was honoured when he felt comfortable enough to let me take him all the way to the beat-up van he and his mother called home. It was parked on a freeway overpass in a neighborhood so rundown the police probably didn’t bother with anything as insignificant as a broken-down van piled high with a family’s few worldly goods.

The school year ended shortly after the radio taping. Next fall Sol was no longer in the same school. No one knew where he had gone. I’ve no idea what happened to him and don’t kid myself his life was forever transformed by his brush with storytelling.

I do know that for at least a while he knew others saw him as talented and valued. For at least a few weeks he believed he was strong enough to draw gems from the rough stones of his life. I hope the memory was a source of courage on the rough path ahead.

And sometimes, when I think of him, my heart just hurts.

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No one was more delighted with the stories of Mohammed bel Halfaoui than the storyteller himself. He had learned them from his mother, in the rhyming phrases of Arabic folktales. He would recite them in Arabic, then in French. Though the stories delighted me in the language I could understand, Mohammed always rued how much they lost in translation.

Still, the stories are layered and rich, even in English. This one seems sadly appropriate for the week after a crazed gunman in Arizona opened fire on Congresswoman Gabrielle Griffins. As I type, she lies in a hospital, a bullet hole through her head. Six others died.

It’s the day of their memorial service. Sarah Palin is accusing her opponents of “blood libel” for objecting to her placing shooting targets, aka crosshairs, on a map of Democrats (including Giffords) who voted for health care. President Obama is flying to Tucson to attend the service. His 2008 election unleashed a flood of racism and rhetoric that heightened the pervasive fear broken open by the attacks of September 2011.

The tragic shooting is leading to a lot of soul searching in a nation where bombast has replaced rational discussion in all too many arenas. Mainstream and independent media are filled with discussions about mental health, gun control, political discourse, social justice, and the need for civility.

The simple tale of a mouse and a kitten is ostensibly about two creatures who are predator and prey by nature. Their coming to that realization is normal, in the scheme of things. However, folktales are never about the surface story. Children are not born knowing who is predator and prey. They are not born recognizing The Other as enemy. This little story points out the problem, not the solution, but perhaps it can lead to some open discussion about tolerance and accepting differences.

Here, from the storyteller who gave me Man with No Brain and Habra with the Lion, comes the tale of the little mouse and the kitten.

One day, a little mouse said to his mother, “I’m big now. Let me go outside and play on my own. It’s not fair to keep me cooped up in this hole.”

The mouse’s mother had always watched over him carefully. She feared the dangers that threaten small mice. Most of all, she feared the cat, who would pounce on her child and eat him.

But at last, seeing how much her son had grown and how keen he was to explore the outside world, she agreed. “Very well, but don’t stay outside too long, and, above all, beware of the cat. He is our greatest enemy.”

The little mouse was thrilled. At last his dream was coming true. He was going outside alone, with no parents to scold him.

Field Mouse

The little mouse was outside on his own, for the very first time (Photo by Som Juan, somjuan's Flickr Photostream)

He ran outside, cheerful and proud. He felt like a grown-up mouse. He could go anywhere he wished, all by himself. He scurried around. Sometimes he stopped and raised his head, looking to the left, then to the right. Then he ran back and forth, delirious with happiness.

He was full of his new-found joy when he saw a little cat. “Oh, hooray,” he said to himself. “I can have a nice friend if this pretty little creature will play with me.”

The kitten was also out on his own for the very first time. As soon as he saw the little mouse, he said to himself, “What a pretty, sweet little creature. If only he wants to play with me!” He approached the little mouse as softly as he could.

The little mouse was delighted. “Do you want to play with me?”

The cat replied, “Yes, I do!”

The two young animals began to play tag. They wrestled and rolled on the ground. They boxed with their paws. They bit each other’s ears. They ran around in circles, chasing each other’s tails, but always gently, delighted with their game.

Kitten

Tomorrow we'll meet again and play like we did today (Photo by Buffa from thebuffafamily Flickr Photostream)

They forgot everything else until the sun began to set. The little mouse said to the kitten, “That’s enough for now. I’m afraid Mama will scold me. Goodbye.”

The kitten replied, “I’m sorry we have to stop. Goodbye. But tomorrow morning we’ll meet again and play like we did today.”

The little ones returned to their homes. When the mouse saw her son, she was relieved.

“Where were you, my child? I was so afraid for you. You were gone the whole day. I was very worried. I was afraid the cat had devoured you. Never stay outside such a long time! It’s not safe.”

But the little mouse was full of the day’s fun. He was impatient with his mother’s warnings. Finally he interrupted, “Oh, if I told you everything… I made a friend. We played together all day long. Oh, Mother, if you could see how cute he is, how handsome, how friendly. I’m sure you would like him. From now on, when I go outside, I won’t be alone. Now I have a friend to play with, from morning till night.”

His mother grew thoughtful. “Yes, my son, that’s good. That’s good. But tell me a little about your friend. Can you describe him to me?”

“Oh, Mama, if you only saw him! It’s true he’s a little bigger than I am but not too much. And his head is a little large and round. And his fur is as soft as silk, so nice to stroke. And he is yellow, and his tail is about that long and thick. And he doesn’t talk the way we do. It’s so pretty to hear him. He says, ‘Me…ow! Me…ow! Me…ow!’ Or he says, ‘Me…ew! Me…ew! Me…ew!’”

Mother Mouse was no longer listening. She had nearly fainted. What she had dreaded most had happened. It was a miracle her child was still alive.

“My dear child, your little friend is a cat! Creatures like that eat mice. He must still be very small and not yet know that mice are his daily food. But beware. His parents will tell him. Don’t go near him again.”

The little mouse didn’t understand a thing his mother said. How could such a sweet little friend ever think of eating him? He turned to his father.

Father Mouse laughed softly. Finally he said, “My little son, cats are our most dangerous enemies. Listen to your mother. Stay inside, safe from the cat. We’re warning you for your own good.”

That was the scene in the mouse’s home. Now let’s see what happened when the kitten went home. His mother was also upset and asked why he had stayed outside so long.

The kitten said, “Dear Mother, if you’d only seen the little friend I met. He’s so handsome, so cute. We played together all day long. We pretended to fight. He bit me; I bit him. He made me fall down. I made him fall down. I’m so lucky to find a good friend. I’ll never be alone when I go outside to play.”

Mother Cat was delighted to see her child so happy. Finally, she said, “Tell us about your pretty little friend.”

Cat

Little fool, and you didn't eat him? (Photo by Kevin Dooley from kevindooley's Flickr Photostream)

“Oh, Mama, if you saw him! He is little, much smaller than I am. He has a pretty, thin little tail. His little head isn’t round like mine. But he has such a pretty nose, narrow and pointed. His ears are pointed too, and so small. And he doesn’t talk like us. He says softly, ‘squeak, squeak’.”

“Little fool,” said his mother. “And you didn’t eat him? That was a mouse! And mice, you little nitwit, are what we eat. Do you understand? Cats eat mice. Always. And you actually had a mouse between your paws and let it get away and are proud of yourself? I am ashamed to have such a stupid child. Tomorrow, you must look for him. As soon as he is near, pounce. Grab him and gobble him up. Do you understand?”

The kitten could not believe his ears. “Eat him? But why? And then who would I play with?”

His father burst out laughing. “My son, listen to your mother. Cats eat mice and have since the world began. Tomorrow we will see what kind of cat you are. As soon as the little mouse comes near, jump on him and devour him. Show us that you are a real cat.

When morning came, the kitten went outside in search of the little mouse. But there was no trace of the mouse anywhere. Not in the courtyard. Not in the street.

Then the kitten saw a tiny hole. He watched it carefully and recognized the shiny eyes of his little mouse friend, safe inside his home.

In his sweetest, slyest voice, the kitten said, “Hello. Come on out, and we’ll play as we did yesterday.”

But the little mouse cried out, “Never! Everything your father and mother told you yesterday, my father and mother told me.”

And so the story ends, of the mouse who learned about cats and the kitten who learned about mice.

Cat + Mouse

Children can be taught fear. They can also be taught compassion and tolerance. (Photo by Denis Defreyne, Flickr Creative Commons)

A post script: In an opinion piece in the January 11th issue of the New York Times, Robert Wright has this to say: “The point is that Americans who wildly depict other Americans as dark conspirators, as the enemy, are in fact increasing the chances, however marginally, that those Americans will be attacked.” His piece is aptly titled: “First Comes Fear”.

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Sometimes a casual remark is a boulder in our river. Our lives bump up against it and are rerouted. If we’re lucky, it sends us off in a good direction instead of a dead end. I have Jay O’Callahan to thank for five words that helped set me firmly on a new Story Route. I carried those five words in my heart and pulled them out whenever I needed a boost.

At the time, I was still pretty new to storytelling. I’d stumbled into it in Rochester, New York, while trying to figure out how to survive as an elementary school librarian. A five-year-old had taught me how entrancing storytelling could be.

Then I discovered there was a local storytelling guild. Ann Gibson, who worked for the Rochester Public Library, invited me to join. I think the others were a bit leery at first since they were a group with serious intent, and I was a newbie. But my enthusiasm overcame their understandable initial uncertainty.

They introduced me to a magical world. I caught the storytelling bug so badly that when Rafe Martin told me he was going to be offering storytelling performances in his book store, I blurted out, “I’m a storyteller. Can I tell stories here?”

I don’t kid myself. The only thing Rafe had to judge my storytelling by was my penchant for buying armloads of books. Hard to turn down a good customer. So I joined the storytelling scene at his book store and loved every minute of it.

When my husband decided to accept a job at the University of Washington, I began weighing my options. I wanted to throw myself into storytelling full time, but I was afraid.

The storytelling guild held a farewell gathering, and I picked a new story to be my pièce de résistance, the tale no one would forget. It bombed (or so I thought), but I was still burning with a desire to launch myself into what felt like a calling.

Between the end of school and the big cross-country move, I traveled to the beating heart of American storytelling, Jonesborough, Tennessee. The annual storytelling conference was being held at Washington College Academy, seven miles west of Jonesborough.

Some of the stars in the burgeoning storytelling movement were scheduled to be instructors at the conference. The one whose work I was most drawn to was Jay O’Callahan. I was determined to learn everything he was willing to share.

Photo of Linda and Jay O'Callahan, taken in Marshfield, Massachussetts in 1988

I participated in every workshop he gave and signed up for any critique session he was offering. Looking back, I’m sure I was the eager puppy, following him around with my tail wagging, desperate for a pat on the head.

He gave me more than that. Jay’s the sort who listens with the kind of attention that opens people like flowers. Toward the end of the conference, we sat chatting about storytelling. I told him of my upcoming move. He asked what my plans were.

I was afraid to tell him I was burning with the desire to be a storyteller – a real storyteller, performing and giving workshops and making a difference through stories. I remember stumbling uncertainly, muttering something about maybe doing some writing, about not being sure.

That’s when he gave me the five-word gift I carried like a shining star. “You can always tell stories,” he said.

He’d heard me tell four or five stories, not enough to offer the endorsement I heard. But I took that sentence and turned it into a talisman. I moved to Seattle, announced to the world I was A Storyteller, became an active part of the Seattle Storytellers Guild, and threw myself into the work of my dreams.

Belfast storytelling

Lord Mayor of Belfast, Nigel Dodds, on the left, Northern Ireland storyteller Liz Weir on the right, Cathryn in the middle - taken during a 1988 storytelling tour set up by Liz

I had no idea just how interesting that work was going to be nor in what unexpected directions it would take me. I’d have followed that dream whether or not I’d met Jay. But he gave me a talisman for the journey, and that made an enormous difference.

We all carry words in our souls. The best ones to keep are those that give us a boost. For years now I’ve had a file of them on my computer. My “nice words” folder holds the particularly encouraging or complimentary things people have written to and about me. They’re for times when I’m judging myself far more harshly than anyone else ever has.

“You can always tell stories” isn’t in the folder. It doesn’t have to be. It’s engraved on my heart.

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